Richard Hempsey rich@knoware.ersys.edmonton.ab.ca AMS Otaku #2! rich@valis.worldgate.edmonton.ab.ca "Hello, is this--" "Hello, Relief Goddesses Office, I'll be there right away." "What? Wait a sec--" That was when my computer exploded. Wow, My Goddess! A "Lemon" Fantasy/Parody Well, at least it _looked_ like it did. Big flash of light, appropriate sound effects, and all that jazz. A second glance told me that this was no explosion, but that something _really_ strange was happening. A tanned pair of hands emerged from the screen, followed (appropriately) by wrists and arms. A mane of white - almost silver - hair came next, and the body that followed wiped any questions (such as "How does a body like that fit through a sixteen-inch monitor?") from my brain. The woman stood in front of me and spoke with a very unusual accent, one I couldn't place. Being totally distracted, I hadn't actually understood a word she had said, so of course I asked her to repeat what she had said. "Uh... what?" With a mildly disgusted look on her face, she stated "I said my name is Urd. I'm a goddess. Now, what's your wish?" "Wish?" I was definitely on a roll, here. Score: brain 0, vocal cords 2. "Yes, a wish! You called our office, you get a wish! Simple. Now, what's it going to be?" "Hold it now... I dial a wrong number, and Spielberg sends a woman over, claiming to be a goddess, to give me a wish? Yeah, right. This is just too wierd." She sounded annoyed now. "Almost, but I _am_ a goddess (and you better not forget it!) and it wasn't Spielberg who sent me. (Sigh.) Oh, I wish my sister were here! This is _her_ job." "Your sister?" "Yes, she normally takes care of these things, but her last `client'" - obvious sarcasm in her voice here - "wished for her to stay with him, so she's stuck there. Now, can I get an answer?" A wish. I get a wish. Wow. By now, my brain was finally starting to work again (or at least the ecchi part was...) and my eyes were drawn (read: violently pulled) to the figure in front of me. As I scanned the vision of female pulchritude in front of me, evil thoughts spun around in my head. Watching me, Urd obviously recognized the expression on my face. "Wait just one minute..." "Hmmm... I wish...," I said slowly, studying Urd's body. "Damn! All right, let's get it over with." Urd looked furious. She grabbed my wrist and, even though I was about five inches taller and 75 pounds heavier, she dragged me over to my bed and practically threw me onto it. (One advantage of living in a basement. No walls, just one big room.) Now, at this point I was totally stunned. Not as much as when Urd had first shown herself, but enough to freeze my limbs. Urd paused in her undressing. "Well? Hurry up, now." She now seemed resigned. "But--" "No buts! Oh, for heaven's sake, I'll do it myself." Two quick waves of her hands and I was naked. (Never did find those clothes. One of my favorite shirts, too.) Urd finished undressing, and turned to me, hands on hips. "Well?" "Wow!" was all I could say. Urd seemed satisfied with my reaction. She climbed onto the bed with me and grabbed me lightly between the legs. "Eh. Not bad." "What the hell is that suppos--" "Shut up, will you? You're getting what you asked for." "But--" "Enough! I said quiet!" To ensure my silence she pushed me onto my back and climbed over my face. I resigned myself to the inevitable. She tasted much as you would expect a goddess to - incredible. I began to get into the action (bad pun intended) and grabbed her hips, to pull her down to me. Urd became more vocal as I worked on her; her moans were easily audible even with her thighs over my ears. My tongue moved over and in her, and only a few minutes passed before she came, loudly. Urd fell over next to me, and lay there, panting lightly. I leaned up on my elbow, and stroked her stomach lightly. "Hey, don't just lie there. It's your turn." Urd looked at me and raised an eyebrow. "Don't look at me like that," I replied. "You're supposed to be granting _my_ wish, remember?" "I know, don't remind me," she replied mildly. "Eh?" Urd pushed me onto my back and lay on her stomach, her head at my waist, our bodies forming a `T'. She stroked me lightly, quietly saying, "No, not bad at all," before bringing her mouth down on me. I feel my toes clench as her lips moved down. I resisted the urge to grab her head by grabbing the bedsheets. Urd's goddess- granted skill brought me to the edge within minutes. I only managed to get out "I'm about to--" before I came. I saw stars as I felt Urd swallowing. Whether she used magic or just skill, Urd kept my motor running. She lifted her head and said, "My turn again!" "What?" I exclaimed before Urd moved up and positioned herself over my hips. She raised an eyebrow, and I replied "Oh, I get it." "You're about to." As Urd sat back, she guided herself onto me. My toes clenched and my eyes crossed as she settled down. When she started moving, I grabbed her hips to slow her down. Neither of us spoke as we moved together. I moved one hand around to stroke her ribs and her breasts. Because of our previous activities, both of us were close. I came first, spasming deep inside the goddess. After I had regained some control, I reached down and stroked Urd, quickly bringing her over. Urd collapsed against me, and I held her while we recovered. We lay quietly together for a while before Urd spoke. "Hmm... Maybe Belldandy does have the right idea..." "Who?" "My sister, remember?" "Ah." Another while later I spoke as casually as I could, "You know, I still haven't given you my wish yet." ====================================================================== A couple of quick comments - I'm basing this story partly on what I've seen or read of AMG - the manga translations at venice, and watching the first two OVAs (unsubbed) with Doug Cha's scripts, and the rest on my own twisted imagination. Comments & (constructive) criticism about the story are appreciated. Flames will be read, laughed at, and trashed. IMHO, I'd much rather be with Belldandy, but she's such a _nice_ person she'd never do anything like this! Copyright of "Aa! Megami-sama" and the characters within belongs to the appropriate copyright holder. Copyright 1993, all the rest of the story, to me. I reserve the right to distribute this story wherever I want. (Written 1993/12/06; slightly revised 1993/12/16)